Are Cancer Men Control Freaks?

A Cancer man’s controlling nature can be triggered by jealousy and emotional insecurity. He doesn’t mean to dominate others. He’s often the one who is intimidated by others, not the other way around.

In fact, a Cancer man is often quite passive in relationships. Yet a Cancer man is insecure and may seek constant reassurance through controlling behaviors. He can be manipulative.

A Cancer man’s controlling nature is often manifested through jealousy and possessiveness. He would rather show you love than fight with you about petty things, so he can be adaptable.

Cancer Men Need Security

A Cancer man’s behavior, when in love, follows a predictable pattern. He will deny any feelings at first and just act like a shy, bashful admirer. He’ll find ways to make sure your paths cross.

All the while insisting it’s just a coincidence and he was not interested in anything more than a friendship. He does this to conceal his vulnerable feelings. He needs to feel secure before he opens up.

In this way, a Cancer man is controlling the pace of the relationship. He will take things slow and wants to see that you are going to take greater initiative. Once you pave the way for the connection, he’ll start to feel more secure.

A Cancer man will then become overtly affectionate and demonstrative about his feelings and attraction to you. He will show he loves you and may even move quickly to define the relationship.

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He Gets Jealous

A Cancer man’s moods and erratic highs and lows are legendary. Being in love brings out the most dramatic of these highs and lows. He can be euphoric one moment and despondent the next.

He rides these emotional tides, his moods changing on a whim. One of the ways he manifests his controlling tendencies is through jealousy. He’ll turn red if he sees you answering a text form another guy.

He’ll also want to know why you didn’t answer your phone when he calls. He’s not trying to limit your friendships. He just needs to feel like he has your social life figured out. This is how he feels secure in relationships.

His jealousy prompts him to “keep tabs” on you and track your interactions with others. If he feels you’re spending too much time or energy in a connection with a friend, he’ll feel hurt and jealous.

He usually won’t come right out and demand you stop talking to other guys. He will, however, bring up his fears and insecurities in many passive-aggressive ways. He’ll make sure you know he’s unhappy about your other male friends.

He Uses Control to Feel Secure

Successfully dating a Cancer man requires you to become adept at reading his emotionally charged signals. What he does or says and what he truly means aren’t always the same thing.

He uses controlling measures to feel secure. He may say things to set you up just to test your loyalty. He may also speak out of a moment’s passionate emotions, when what he really meant was not what he said.

He may issue an ultimatum, thinking that by doing so you’ll conform to his wishes. He doesn’t stop to think in the moment that you may actually take him up on his ultimatum and he’ll be stuck with the consequences.

Though his controlling security measures don’t always succeed, it doesn’t stop a Cancer man from repeatedly trying to have his own way. He will insist on trying to make the world fit his ideals and has a hard time accepting it when life doesn’t meet his expectations.

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He Uses Control to Protect His Feelings

When you understand why a Cancer man acts controlling, suddenly his seemingly manipulative measures are more practical. Dating a Cancer man will teach you to be attuned to feelings he doesn’t openly express.

A Cancer man is so sensitive, in fact, that he will try to overcompensate. He’ll make it seem like he’s much more confident than he really is. Trying to control your perception of him helps him protect himself. So does trying to control his surroundings.

Cancer men sometimes show their feelings openly. It usually takes time to get to this stage. In the meantime, he’ll protect his feelings by going quiet. He may cancel plans when he’s upset.

He’s not doing this to push you away. He doesn’t want you to see his vulnerability. He’s protecting his reputation as a tough and competent man by hiding away when he can’t otherwise control his emotions.

He’s Emotionally Controlling

If you want to know how to make a Cancer man open up, it’s not hard to do. The key is to let him know that you can handle his emotional rollercoaster. A Cancer man is like a Pandora’s Box of feelings.

He doesn’t even know for sure what will be unleashed when he starts to show his deeper emotional side. Since he’s so tuned in to emotions, he also knows very well how to use emotions to control others.

He can either be the world’s best confidant or the world’s biggest manipulator. When he’s being emotionally controlling, he’s trying to either make you happy or keep you interested in him. He isn’t consciously trying to hurt you.

Yet the games he plays in order to keep you emotionally linked to him can have an impact. You may feel exhausted because of his dramatic highs and lows. You may also start to second guess your own feelings.

For a Cancer man, the dark side of love is control and manipulation. If he feels insecure or doubts your loyalty to him, he will go to some lengths to try to keep you emotionally dependent on him.

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He Uses Guilt to Control

There are three types of Cancer man, zodiac experts will tell you. Those who are emotionally nurturing and family oriented, those who are business savvy and concerned about using money to create security, and those who use guilt to manipulate.

A Cancer man can use guilt to control you. He’s quite skilled at the subtle art of guilt trips. Since he often sees himself as the victim, he knows just how to play up a sad story. He’ll do this to get your attention and to keep you in his life.

To a Cancer man, this isn’t something he thinks of as manipulation. He just naturally sees this as a response to his own feelings being hurt. Often he doesn’t realize his own hurt feelings are a response to his victim narrative, not something you did wrong.

When a Cancer man starts to lay on a heavy guilt trip, don’t buy into his victim story line. Instead try to empathize with his feelings. Your validation will soothe him and he’ll become more secure. This can decrease his need to take control of the situation.

He Wants to Control His Home

When a Cancer man is done with you, he’ll make it clear. One of the boundaries he’ll set is to keep you out of his home and disconnected from his family. He loves to have complete control over family matters.

He can be protective. One of the ways he tries to show love and nurturing is to be an overprotective and sometimes controlling partner or parent. He wants control of all the decisions pertaining to the home. From renovations to decorations, he will want to have the final say.

When it comes to his home, he loves to be casual and relax on the couch cuddling with you. But a Cancer man’s home is his castle. Don’t be offended if he doesn’t let you into certain areas of his home.

He may feel self-conscious if his home is not up to standard in his opinion. He may also crave privacy when it comes to certain aspects of his home such as the bedroom. He may be controlling over whether or not he lets you into his inner sanctuary.

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He Controls Family

Cancer men sometimes confuse love and control. This is especially true when it comes to family matters. A Cancer dad will hover over his children, protectively shuttling them from place to place.

A Cancer partner will want to have the final say in what goes on in his relationship with you. He may seem relaxed and bashful but underneath the façade he’s insecure. He’ll try to make sure the relationship is perfect.

Sometimes, his idea of perfection can involve possessiveness and manipulation. He tries hard to be your ideal partner so you’ll never look at another man. Yet this can come across as being dominating.

He can also be controlling about other family relationships. He may insist you go to his family’s home for special dinners. He may also conversely insist that you keep the romantic relationship separate from his family.

Though you may think he’s hiding you when he does this, he’s not. He just wants to make sure you are serious and committed in a partnership before he gets family involved. He needs to control the boundaries in order to feel secure.

You may also notice he uses gifts to emotionally soothe and control his family members. A Surprise gift after an argument or gifts to encourage you to trust or open up to him, for example.