Virgo Man Hot & Cold

It’s common for Virgo men to be emotionally distant and to have trouble opening up. Your Virgo man might slide between hot and cold because he wants to open up and get to know you, but it isn’t easy.

A Virgo man will also act hot and cold because he has high standards and unrealistic expectations. He’ll go cold when you don’t do what he wants and may continue acting that way until he adjusts his standards.

Try to understand when your Virgo man is hot and cold, but also know when to let go.

He Has Incredibly High Standards

If you’re dating a Virgo man, you should know he has incredibly high standards. His hot and cold behavior is sometimes a sign that he’s unsure whether or not you can meet those standards.

Your Virgo man might start getting closer to you because he’s interested in getting to know you. You intrigue him, and he wants to learn more about you.

As he gets to know you, though, certain traits might make him question whether or not you’re right for him. When that happens, he’ll start to go cold.

Your Virgo man may also act hot and cold because he’s rethinking his standards and realizes they might be unrealistic. He might go cold on you because you don’t meet a certain standard, only to warm up once he realizes nobody can meet that standard.

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He’s Not Always Realistic About Expectations

Virgo men are not always realistic about their expectations, just like they aren’t always realistic about their standards. These two issues go hand-in-hand and are a potential reason a Virgo man might act hot and cold.

A Virgo man’s unrealistic expectations for a relationship can cause many problems in his life. He may have trouble connecting to people and finding someone to settle down with because nobody can live up to his expectations.

Your Virgo man may act warm and affectionate when you meet his expectations, then go cold when you don’t. He won’t always realize that his expectations aren’t realistic and will sometimes treat you poorly when you can’t or won’t meet them.

If you’re wondering when to let go of a Virgo man, reflect on his expectations. Talk to him if he expects things of you that you can’t do or aren’t willing to do. If he doubles down on those expectations, let him go.

He’s Uncertain About You

Why do Virgo men go quiet? Sometimes, a Virgo man will go cold because he’s uncertain about you. He might act hot and cold if he’s worried you may not be the person for him.

A Virgo man will warm up to you if he likes your personality or sees something in you that attracts him. Then, he might question his perception of you or his compatibility with you.

If he’s uncertain about you, a Virgo man will go cold while he thinks things over. He might realize that he wants to get to know you more, so he’ll continue talking to and hanging out with you but may keep his distance emotionally.

Once your Virgo man figures things out, he’ll do one of two things. He’ll either warm back up because he decides he is into you, or he’ll go completely cold and pull away because he decides you’re not right for him.

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He Has Trouble Opening Up

If a Virgo man is hiding his feelings or goes back and forth between opening up and cutting you off, he might have trouble opening up.

Virgo men are more sensitive and emotional than they let on. They try to appear logical and rational at all times, but many emotions lurk underneath their calm demeanor.

Some Virgo men have trouble opening up because they’re worried about seeming irrational or overly emotional. Others have been hurt before or burnt by people they’ve opened up to, so it’s harder to do it again.

Your Virgo man might want to open up, but that doesn’t mean it will be easy. He may warm up to you and start sharing more things with you, only to pull back and go cold out of fear or insecurity.

He’s Been Hurt Before

Sometimes, a Virgo man’s behavior can be explained by the fact that he’s been hurt or betrayed in a past relationship.

Your Virgo man might have been burnt by opening up and being vulnerable with someone in the past. If his last relationship ended poorly, he might act hot and cold with you while he figures out if he can trust you.

A Virgo man who has been hurt before will have an even harder time opening up and trusting someone. He might be interested in you, but that doesn’t mean trusting you, and being entirely open will be easy.

Your Virgo man might warm up to you, then pull back because he’s scared. Even if you haven’t done anything to make him think that you’ll hurt him, he’ll still struggle to open up fully.

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He’s Not Ready for a Relationship

Another reason a Virgo man might be hot and cold is that he’s not ready for a relationship. You might want a relationship with your Virgo man, but that doesn’t mean he’s on the same page as you.

Your Virgo man may think he wants a relationship and start to flirt and warm up to you, only to realize he’s not actually ready. He may need to get over a past relationship, or he might be focused on work or school and unable to focus on a relationship.

A Virgo man might not be ready for a romantic relationship, but he may still want to be friends or keep you in his life. He’ll warm up to you and get to know you better, but he might go cold if you express romantic interest.

If your Virgo man isn’t ready for a relationship, you don’t need to wait around for him. He will continue to act hot and cold, but you can move on and find someone who is ready for a relationship.

He’s Emotionally Distant

Your Virgo man might be hot and cold because he’s naturally emotionally distant. Why are Virgo men cold and distant? Many of them are just like that when they first meet someone.

If it’s normal for your Virgo man to be emotionally distant, that’s likely how he will act in stressful situations. He might be warming up to you, but he’ll go cold if he’s overwhelmed or upset instead of asking for help.

Even if your Virgo man likes you and wants to get closer to you, he’ll still go cold sometimes. He usually tries to deal with his emotions on his own. If he’s upset about something, he is more likely to go cold than to seek support.

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He Has Low Self-esteem

A Virgo man’s personality tends to be humble and modest. He sometimes acts this way due to low self-esteem, though. If he can’t take a compliment or goes cold when you express interest in him, it might be because he thinks he isn’t good enough.

Your Virgo man’s hot and cold behavior might be tied to his confidence. He may warm up to you and express interest when he’s feeling good about himself, then pull back if he feels insecure.

A Virgo man’s self-esteem issues aren’t something that can be fixed immediately. All you can do is be patient, continue expressing interest in a respectful and non-pushy way, and try to reassure him if you think he’s feeling insecure.

Be Patient When He’s Distant

In the early stages of dating a Virgo man, he will sometimes be distant. He will go cold due to fear or insecurity or because he doesn’t quite know how to open up completely.

Try to be patient with your Virgo man when he’s being hot and cold. If he genuinely seems interested in you but is having trouble opening up, be as understanding as possible.

You don’t have to put up with poor behavior, of course. If your Virgo man’s behavior is really upsetting you, talk to him. Don’t accuse him of anything or lash out, though. He’ll try to explain and do better if he cares about you.

Eventually, your Virgo man will stop acting hot and cold if he wants to be with you. It may take a while to get to that point.

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Try to Reassure Him

If your Virgo man disappears and reappears due to his insecurities or self-esteem, try to reassure him. If you know he withdraws when he feels bad, reach out to offer support.

Your Virgo man likely won’t ask for support or reassurance, especially early in your relationship. He will act hot and cold because he won’t want you to see him in a bad mood.

A Virgo man might disappear when he’s feeling bad, even if his feelings have nothing to do with you. He’ll try to take care of things himself, then return when he feels better.

Reach out to your Virgo man and try to reassure him if you think he’s upset. Remind him that you care, which might help him stop pulling away from you.