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How Does a Virgo Man Test You?

Updated September 18, 2024

A Virgo man testing you before getting into a relationship or letting a friendship develop is very common.

Virgo doesn’t trust easily. He tests people to make sure they are worthy of his trust before he opens up to them.

Is a Virgo man manipulative? Some people think that the ways he tests people can be manipulative or controlling. However, he just thinks of his tests as ways to ensure he’s not opening up to the wrong person.

Why does Virgo test everyone he meets? So he can be particular about the people he develops relationships with.

A Virgo man may be confused in love. He doesn’t know right away if somebody is “the one.” He doesn’t know if he can trust them or open up. This is why he tests people.

Asks Questions

How does a Virgo man test you? Often, the first thing he does is ask questions.

Everyone asks people questions when first meeting them. This is a normal thing to do and doesn’t mean that every single person is testing you.

However, Virgo will ask specific kinds of questions. For example, he might ask how your previous relationships ended.

He wants to see if he can spot any red flags. For example, did you cheat on a previous partner? Are you always the one breaking up with them?

He’ll also ask questions related to your habits and values. For example, do you have a career plan? How are you with money? Do you want kids in the future? Do you see yourself settling down and getting married any time soon?

If you’ve known one another for a while and he suddenly starts asking all kinds of odd questions, he might be testing you. Think about whether something changed in your relationship to suddenly warrant this.

This is the #1 mistake women make with a Virgo man... →

He Ghosts You

Why does a Virgo man ignore you sometimes? This can be frustrating, especially if you two have been hanging out and talking a lot.

Sometimes, he doesn’t mean to ghost you. He has a lot going on in his life. He isn’t going to have time to hang out with you every day or even every week.

He does ghost people on purpose sometimes. Why? Usually, it’s because he wants to see how you’ll react.

If you just go on about your business until he has time to make plans with you, that shows him you respect his space and boundaries.

If you get angry with him, constantly ask mutual friends about him, call/text him multiple times, etc., that is a red flag for him.

He doesn’t like clingy people. He likes to have alone time, and he needs the people in his life to understand that.

Will a Virgo man lead you on, only to end up ghosting you permanently? Most of the time, he’s not trying to lead you on. Instead, he’s trying to figure out if you two are compatible.

His Text Messages

When a Virgo man goes silent during a text conversation, this isn’t always a sign he’s testing you. But, unfortunately, he does that even to his closest friends.

He just gets busy. He might be working, out with another friend, working on a project, etc. He typically only focuses on one thing at a time, and he’ll reply to your text when he has time.

If you send him a message and then proceed to send numerous others when he doesn’t reply, that shows him you’re too needy for him. This doesn’t mean that you actually are needy or clingy. That is just what he thinks.

If you don’t say anything else until he replies, that tells him you are perfectly capable of giving him space and having a life outside of him.

If you can’t wait a few hours to get a reply from him, a Virgo man probably isn’t for you anyway.

Is your Virgo man painfully distant? Rekindle your love. →

He’ll Make Plans

Making plans with someone is an easy way for a Virgo man to test them. So it’s not odd to make plans with new friends or potential love interests.

If he makes plans with you, it’s not just as a way to test you. Instead, he wants to spend time with you!

He will be paying attention to whether or not you follow through with the plans. Do you show up on time? Do you cancel at the last minute?

Canceling once because of an unavoidable circumstance isn’t a red flag. However, constantly showing up late or canceling at the last minute shows him that you don’t respect his time.

How do you know if a Virgo man is playing you and not just testing you? He will be the one to cancel plans. This is very out of character for him. If he does so (and it’s not an emergency), he’s probably not serious about you.

Serious Conversations

Virgo men don’t typically like having emotional conversations with people they aren’t close to. So if they have a serious conversation with an acquaintance, it’s usually about a topic he’ll talk with anyone about.

He will pay attention to how often you bring up serious or emotional topics. However, if you constantly ask personal questions or try to get him to open up before he’s ready, he’ll withdraw from you.

If he initiates a serious conversation, pay attention. It might be a “relationship talk” where you define a romantic or sexual relationship.

He might share something with you that is personal but not too personal. This is to see how you react to him opening up.

Don’t share anything he tells you with other people. He’ll find out, and he won’t be happy about it.

If a Virgo man acts uninterested after having a serious conversation with you, it might be because something about your reaction to the conversation worries him.

Use these secrets to make your Virgo man love you (they work like magic) →

He’ll Criticize You

If a Virgo man is pushing you away, he might be overly critical. He’ll use criticism as a way to test you as well.

If he’s constantly rude to you and criticizes every single thing you do, that is probably not a test. Instead, that is a sign he doesn’t like you.

If he makes a small, judgemental comment about your outfit, that might be a test. He’s checking how you react to the comment.

If you get upset, he might think you’re overreacting. He is making a minor, “helpful” criticism, not being rude. A big emotional response will turn him off.

Most people are not fans of this type of “test.” It makes Virgo come across as insensitive.

If you do intend to keep being friends with him (or more), you’ll need to make boundaries with him. Tell him what areas are off-topic for criticism. If he can’t respect those boundaries, move on.

Promises

If you make a promise to a Virgo, no matter how small, you absolutely must keep it.

If you say he can borrow your camera and that you’ll bring it to him when you two meet up for lunch, make sure you bring the camera. It might seem like a minor thing to you. But, unfortunately, it’s not to him.

If you say you’ll call him at a specific time, you better call him on time. Don’t leave him hanging.

Virgo can’t stand it when people don’t keep their promises. It tells him that you’re unreliable.

If you can’t keep a small promise, why should he trust you? He won’t want to open up to you and potentially give you his heart. He needs somebody who is reliable and who he can trust with everything.

The simple secrets you can use to seduce and keep your Virgo man (they work like magic) →

Emotional Control

Why does a Virgo man withdraw at times? One reason is that he isn’t always open about how he’s feeling. Instead, he likes to keep tight control of his emotions.

Virgo will do things to test your emotional control. For example, he might criticize you, as mentioned, to see how you react. He might think your reaction is too emotional. He might think it’s out of proportion to what he said.

If he thinks you’re “too emotional,” he might back off. He thinks of himself as a logical, rational person. He likes it when other people are similar to him in that way.

This doesn’t mean you can’t show any emotion. He just wants to make sure you won’t yell at him over every little thing or have a breakdown any time he makes a small comment.

Boundaries

Boundaries are extremely important to Virgo.

He will set clear boundaries. Even if you think the boundary is silly, you need to respect it.

If you can’t respect a small boundary, such as not texting him while he’s at work, how can he trust you to respect more significant boundaries?

He’ll move on from you if you show him that you don’t listen when he sets a boundary.

Everyone has boundaries. You do too! If you want him to respect your boundaries, then you must respect his.

Virgo can’t open up to somebody who disrespects and constantly pushes his boundaries.

He might enjoy somebody who pushes him to go outside of his comfort zone sometimes. That’s different. There is a difference between encouraging him to try something new and forcing him to do something he doesn’t want to do.

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