Venus Quincunx Black Moon Lilith: Intimacy & Control

What does Venus quincunx Black Moon Lilith mean? Love and eroticism will be out of alignment in this quincunx. There may be a desire to explore the darker side of sensuality. However, there is also shame related to that desire.

Individuals might feel like they are only useful when they are pleasing others. A couple might place too much importance on sex and become nervous due to that.

Opening up and connecting to others can be difficult with this quincunx. Until sexuality can be embraced without overthinking it, the energy of this aspect will be uncomfortable.

Natal

Venus quincunx Black Moon Lilith in a chart can create a powerful, seductive energy. However, it also causes insecurity, hypersexuality, and an inability to form intimate, emotional relationships that involve more than sex.

People with this quincunx in their charts can also go in the opposite direction and repress their sexual urges. If they feel their worth to others is based too much on sex, they might pull away to show others that they are more than the pleasure they can give.

If Venus quincunx Black Moon Lilith is in your Natal Chart, you likely have a complicated relationship with sex. You might use sex to manipulate and control others, either through denying it or giving others what they want in exchange for what you want.

Your self-worth may be tied to your inner desires and primal urges in some way. You might feel sex is all you can offer others and use that to your advantage. You may also become insecure because of this, though.

You may struggle with your shadow side and more taboo sexual desires. You might feel these make you unlovable in some way or that your urges are too strange to find genuine love and affection in others.

The key to working through this quincunx is to develop a healthier relationship with sex. You must acknowledge your urges but stop worrying about what others think of them or how they affect your worth.

Understand that you are more than the pleasure you can offer to others. Express your desires authentically and act on your sexual feelings because you genuinely want to, not because you believe sex will earn the love of others.

Don’t repress your sexuality, but don’t let it control you, either. You can discover the softer, more intimate side of relationships if you can work through your unhealthy relationship to sex.

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Transit

Venus quincunx Black Moon Lilith during a transit can create tension in your relationships. You might feel disconnected from the people you love or your inner desires.

If Black Moon Lilith transits your natal Venus, you might want to disconnect from some of your relationships. You may want more freedom or have space to explore your sexual desires without fear of judgment.

If Venus transits your natal Black Moon Lilith, your values and desires might feel incompatible. You may question some of your urges or feel unworthy because of them.

The Venus-Black Moon Lilith quincunx can cause you to question your desires and relationships with others. You might want to break free from a relationship if you feel stifled, but you may also desire a new relationship where you can explore and express yourself.

While you should listen to your desires and urges, you should not be too impulsive during this time. Don’t end a relationship or dive into a new one without carefully thinking things through.

This can be an excellent time to start exploring sexually or asserting yourself, as long as you’re careful. Talk to your partner before trying anything new in the bedroom, and find healthy ways to get the freedom you desire.

If you feel like your self-worth is being affected by your sexuality and how you express it, examine why you think that. Are you unable to fully express your desires? Do you feel sex somehow tarnishes your image?

Writing down any conflicting feelings of yours can help. Opening up about your desires to a partner or discussing insecurities with a close friend can assist you in working through those insecurities as well.

To work through this quincunx, allow yourself to feel your emotions without going overboard. Don’t be ashamed of your appearance or desires. Allow your inner power to shine through.

Synastry

Venus quincunx Black Moon Lilith in synastry creates a tense dynamic between the harmonious side of Venus and the wild side of Black Moon Lilith. This couple may struggle to balance connection and independence.

The Venus partner in this relationship might focus more on connecting to the Black Moon Lilith partner. In contrast, the Black Moon Lilith partner focuses more on gaining independence and freedom.

This couple may have trouble connecting, being vulnerable with one another, and finding a balance between the soft side of romance and the more primal, passionate side of a relationship.

The inability to find a balance between connection and independence is one of the Venus quincunx Black Moon Lilith cons. This couple may also struggle to talk about their desires, relationship expectations, and values. They might feel like they cannot share their authentic selves.

The Black Moon Lilith partner might feel stifled by the Venus partner’s ways of expressing affection. The Venus partner may feel a lack of balance due to how the Black Moon Lilith partner tries to express their desires.

This couple has the potential to form strong romantic and sexual bonds, which are some of the Venus quincunx Black Moon Lilith pros. They need to learn to communicate better and express their needs and desires.

These two can learn how to express love for one another and connect without giving up their independence. They can have freedom while bonding and forming a solid, stable relationship.

If this couple is willing to work together, they can be satisfied. They can become more confident in their desires and explore their primal sides together while having a gentle, affectionate bond.

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Composite

Venus quincunx Black Moon Lilith in a Composite Chart typically indicates a couple might feel disconnected sexually and romantically. Even if they want to show affection for one another or express their desires, something blocks them from doing so.

This couple might feel restless and nervous around one another. If each partner has differing values, they will have trouble compromising and balancing them. They will likely be unable to connect over shared desires, either.

Sometimes, this couple is so fiercely independent that they fail to connect. They may focus too much on the sexual aspect of their relationship and neglect the romantic side or fail to spend time together.

It’s also common to have power struggles within this relationship. Both partners might exert their inner power on one another, resulting in a toxic and unhealthy dynamic between them.

This couple must learn how to connect genuinely, communicate effectively, and balance their desire for freedom with the need to bond and form a solid relationship.

If this couple feels like they are incompatible in some way, but they are still drawn together, they should try to reach a compromise. They should open their minds and be willing to explore together. This can help them connect.

If these partners want a relationship, they must make room for one another. They don’t have to relinquish their independence or ignore their power. They have to allow the other into their life.

When these two try to work together, they can figure out how to satisfy each other. They can express their desires and have a romantic, affectionate relationship.

Solar Return

Venus quincunx Black Moon Lilith during a solar return can indicate you will experience power struggles in your relationships in the upcoming year.

Depending on how assertive or dominant you are, you may need to exert your power more, but you may also need to give up control and let others exert their power.

You may want to examine your romantic and sexual relationships in the upcoming year. Are you being authentic in them? Are you fully expressing your desires and encouraging your partners to do so, too?

Venus inconjunct Black Moon Lilith can also make you more aware of sexual desires you usually repress.

You might discover that you aren’t being fully honest with yourself about your preferences because you feel they are not aligned with your values or what you believe is expected of you.

You may also realize that you have an unhealthy relationship with sex in the upcoming year. You might use it to gain self-worth or acceptance, or you may avoid it out of shame.

Either way, you will need to examine why you have sexual issues. This can be a great year to develop a better self-image and self-acceptance. You should try to understand yourself and your urges better.

If you have power struggles or insecurities in relationships, examine why that is as well. Finding balance, connecting to your inner self, and understanding your power will help to grow your confidence and create healthier relationships.