If you’re getting the Virgo man silent treatment, you may wonder if it’s over. You thought everything was great, but now question the relationship.
There’s more to his sudden distance than you might expect. It’s not always a red flag.
A Virgo man, when hurt, can certainly clam up and turn cold. But he will also go silent for a variety of reasons.
Not all of them are reasons to panic. A Virgo man suddenly distant can indicate several things.
He may be sending you a signal that he wants to slow down, he may be upset, he may even just be busy.
It’s important to figure out the nuances to his silent treatment before jumping to any conclusion.
- What Communication Means to a Virgo Man
- What His Silence Means: Best Case Scenario
- What His Silence Means: Worst Case Scenario
- What to Do if You’re Not Sure Why He’s Gone Quiet
- How to Respond to Silence if You Know He’s Mad or Upset
- Don’t Chase Him
- Show Concern without Smothering Him
- Keep Your Text Short and to the Point
- Don’t Make Assumptions
- Best Reactions to Help Re-Engage Him
What Communication Means to a Virgo Man
First it’s important to understand what communication means to a Virgo man. Unlike many of the signs, a Virgo man doesn’t like to talk unless there is a solid, practical reason. You may wonder, “Is my Virgo man ignoring me after an argument because he’s mad?”
The truth is he doesn’t always go quiet out of anger. In fact, when he’s angry he would usually rather point out why he’s upset so that you can do something to fix the problem.
To a Virgo man, communication is not about bonding primarily. It’s a means of sharing information, educating and helping. If he doesn’t think he has anything helpful or informative to say, he may go quiet.
Tempting as it is, it’s important to not project your ideas about what communication should be onto a Virgo man. You may communicate to show affection, love, emotional support and to feel a stronger connection.
These things are all important in a relationship, but these are not his primary reasons for communication. In this regard, you could say he operates in the reverse of most people. He prioritizes information and practicality over emotional connection and understanding.
What His Silence Means: Best Case Scenario
If you’re wondering how to know if a Virgo man is pushing you away, you have to consider several factors. Sometimes a Virgo man acts uninterested but really is attracted to you. Sometimes he seems indifferent but is really just following his Virgo instincts.
A Virgo man not texting back right away or taking his time to respond could be busy. He has a practical sense of priorities and may pay more attention to his work and to-do list than his emotional interests.
Best case scenario, he is showing you boundaries through a slower pace. He may also be giving you the silent treatment unintentionally when other priorities or interests have taken over his focus.
Odd as it sounds, he may also just have nothing he feels is important to say. Many women would rather at least hear from him, even for a brief “Hello, how are you?” Yet a Virgo man won’t take time to engage in small talk.
If your efforts to contact him included communication that was trite, superficial or deemed by him to be unimportant, he won’t be in a rush to respond. This doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you. It just means he has higher priorities now.
What His Silence Means: Worst Case Scenario
Sometimes his reasons for not responding are a red flag. You may wonder about how to know when a Virgo man is done with you? Look for signs of a worst case scenario. The silent treatment could mean that he’s not as interested in the relationship as you thought.
When he’s really into you, a Virgo man will take the time to try to resolve differences. He’s motivated to help you improve. So even if he’s angry, he would rather talk to you about what to do differently than ignore the issue and disappear.
That is unless he’s decided it is no longer worth his time and energy. For instance, if he’s already talked with you about an important boundary or issue but doesn’t feel you were taking his boundaries seriously.
If it’s the same problem happening again and again, he may start to think you aren’t open to improving yourself or the relationship. He won’t waste time with frustrating circumstances. He’ll just grow distant.
What to Do if You’re Not Sure Why He’s Gone Quiet
Women often ask “How does a Virgo man test you?” Sometimes the silent treatment seems like a test. Usually it’s not consciously intended as one. A Virgo man is too concrete for artificial challenges.
Though your response to his distance will tell him a lot about you and he’ll take note of drama and intense reactions. If you’re not sure why he’s gone quiet, don’t make assumptions. First, give him some space.
In time he may just resume his normal method of communication. Even if he doesn’t, you’ll get better results if you think like a Virgo. Follow up with him after some time has gone by. Use brief, direct, concrete statements.
If you ask questions, don’t bring up what’s gone on and why he’s been quiet. Instead, ask questions that engage him in the present. Engage his desire to assist you in regards to matters he hasn’t already tried to help you with.
You can try to come right out and ask him if something is wrong, but before you do, really stop to consider if his behavior is out of the ordinary for a Virgo man.
If it is definitely above and beyond the usual time he routinely contacts you, that’s one thing. But if it is a matter of silence after he missed a date with you or if his silence goes against his normal routine of checking in, check in on him.
Do so in a practical way. Don’t jump to conclusions or make assumptions. Ask if there is anything he needs while you’re at the store. Ask how a project is coming along. Show interests in his tasks and work rather than getting emotional.
How to Respond to Silence if You Know He’s Mad or Upset
When a Virgo man wants you back, he’ll definitely show you. He’ll start the conversation. He’ll reply to your attempt to check in with him. Don’t corner him for explanations.
When he reaches back out it means he’s gotten his bearings again. He’s taken breathing room to gain perspective and may be ready to work on solving the problem in the relationship.
If he doesn’t spontaneously come around in a few days to a week, you can try to reconnect first. Do give him some time to cool off first. If you know he’s mad or upset you will need to be careful to not escalate the situation.
The good thing about a Virgo man is even when he’s angry he’s still more solution oriented than emotion driven. He still wants to try to make things better. He’s taking this time to analyze how he feels and understand what could make things better.
If you reach out first, make it clear that you’ve analyzed the situation. Take responsibility for your role in the dilemma and explain what you’re doing differently now. Make this a concise statement if possible.
Don’t Chase Him
Under certain circumstances, a Virgo man always come back. If he’s really interested and believes you are willing to improve the relationship, he’ll give the relationship another try.
When a Virgo man wants you back, he’ll give you indicators of this. He’ll gradually break down his wall of silence without going deep into explanations or getting into emotionally heavy topics.
Keep your interactions minimal and practical when you’re both first re-connecting. Whatever you do, don’t pursue him. There’s a chance his silence was a way of slowing things down anyway. Let him resume his sense of security.
Show Concern without Smothering Him
Show your Virgo man that you’re thinking of him and still interested, but don’t overwhelm him. Statements like “I want to make things better” or “Help me understand how to improve the relationship” go far with him.
These statements show that you’re there for him, but also that you are willing to work on the relationship. He loves the thought of improving, advancing, renovating or healing. He’s not afraid of conflict but he needs to see that you’re learning from conflict.
What he doesn’t like is drama. Even on social media try to not be smothering. He likes connecting with you on his schedule. He doesn’t like feeling like you’re dominating his time.
Keep Your Text Short and to the Point
Whether he’s reconnected with you or not, try to keep your texts brief as a general rule. He doesn’t like reading paragraphs on text. As much as he likes details, save those conversations for in person communication.
When you text, think of the basics. What, when, where, why, who are the main things he needs to know to get your point. Also try to keep your texts focused on practical things.
Think of texting a Virgo man in a similar way to how you would text your boss. Chances are you’d only send brief messages that get to the point and have practical value. Save more intimate conversations for intimate moments.
Don’t Make Assumptions
Jumping to conclusions will definitely sabotage a relationship with a Virgo man. You’ll end up making assumptions based on what you would like to see him do, not what is actually in his nature. Try to avoid this.
Women often think his silence means something dramatic has taken place. He’s found someone new, his feelings suddenly changed, he’s mad and so forth. Usually it is quite the opposite.
A Virgo man’s sudden silence is much more typical of something boring and routine. He’s busy. His phone ran out of minutes or his internet went out. When it comes to major issues, a Virgo man would rather tell you directly what he’s thinking.
The last thing you typically have to think about is infidelity or him finding someone new. Usually he’s concrete and clearly defines his interests and boundaries. He’s one of the least likely signs to be sneaky or deceptive. Give him the benefit of the doubt.
Best Reactions to Help Re-Engage Him
The best ways to re-engage a Virgo man involve a few important steps. Stay calm. Deep inside, you may be panicking and worried about the fate of your relationship.
Take some deep breaths, process your feelings with close and understanding friends. Ground yourself. If you do decide to reach out to him, give yourself some time to get anchored first.
When you do reach out, be as calm, practical, patient and present oriented as you can. Try to not be reactive or demanding. What seemed like a disappearing act to you may have been a benign act on his part.
Don’t assume he was purposely ignoring you. Unless he’s given you clear indications he’s upset, don’t jump to that assumption. If you suspect or know that he is upset about specific things, show through your actions and communication that you’re working to resolve the problems.