If you are wondering what will make a Virgo man apologize, there are some things you need to understand about a Virgo’s mindset.
How do Virgos act when they are guilty? The same as any other emotion. They intellectualize and rationalize.
A Virgo man, after an argument, will take time to analyze the situation. He’ll rationalize his own reactions. He’ll draw out the facts of the matter.
If and only if he made a mistake, he’ll admit it. He’ll apologize for his actions. He won’t apologize to keep the peace or to avoid making you upset.
A Virgo man also won’t apologize for your feelings or how he made you feel. He’ll focus only on his objective behavior or incorrect information. He won’t own your reaction.
He Doesn’t Always Apologize Directly
A Virgo man always comes back to the core issues in the conflict. He will sort through the emotion and reactions and stick with the core misunderstandings or mistakes. He’ll try to make sense of the error or reason you’re upset.
How does a Virgo man apologize? He will speak directly to the core issue at hand. He’ll bypass your feelings. The world of emotion is too vague and subjective for him to address. He’ll keep his focus on facts and data.
When a Virgo man wants you back, he won’t suddenly apologize to placate you. He will only apologize directly for his actions or misinformation. A Virgo man will not break from his high standards even if he’s trying to win you back after an argument.
He’ll Wait Until After the Issue is Resolved
One of the most complicated things about the way a Virgo man apologizes is his timing. He won’t apologize to get you to calm down. When there is a conflict, there is one thing on his mind. He wants to solve the problem.
If you misunderstood him or he misunderstood you, he wants to explain himself or let you explain yourself. He’ll focus more on clearing the air and making sure you are both on the same page. He’s going to focus on the details of what went wrong.
Even after the initial problem is settled, he will retreat for a while to analyze every aspect of the situation. A Virgo man will process every detail of the situation and pick apart what he did wrong and also what you did wrong.
He will re-emerge when he’s fully and thoroughly analyzed every aspect of what went wrong. He’ll drill it down to a few key issues or one behavior. Then and only then, he will apologize directly.
Unfortunately, he will also follow this with a statement of what you did wrong and need to apologize for. He takes responsibility personally but may not take personal responsibility.
For example instead of saying “I’m sorry, I forgot your birthday…” He’ll say “I’m sorry, there was a lot going on and I knew it was your birthday but didn’t think of it until it was too late.”
He apologizes after the fact because he needs to process the issue first and decide what exactly went wrong. He needs to let some time go by so that he can be clear about his responsibility in the situation.
Instead of Saying He’s Sorry, He’ll Make Changes
When he is able to change his behavior, a Virgo man will do just that. It is his form of apology in action. If you’re wondering how to manipulate a Virgo man into making an overt apology, it may be better to acknowledge he is apologizing.
If he hurt your feelings because he didn’t text you enough to check in, he won’t tell you he’s sorry. He doesn’t see this problem as something he should feel remorseful or guilty about.
Instead he sees it as a learning experience. He is learning what you want from him. Instead of verbally expressing his remorse, he will reconcile the issue by not repeating the problem. He’ll fix what was wrong in the first place.
If you ignore a Virgo man until he verbally apologizes, you may be missing an important opportunity to heal and move on from the conflict with a Virgo man. You are better off working with him to solve the problems and overcome your differences.
A Virgo man is a perfectionist. He doesn’t want to just apologize to make you feel better. He wants to make sure any flaws have been resolved. This means both his flaws and yours. He will look at most dilemmas as being a two way street to some extent.
He’ll examine where you both went wrong. He will make moves to fix his side of the conflict but will also look to you to resolve your side of the conflict. If you don’t, he’ll feel like you didn’t take the situation seriously or are taking the easy way out.
In a sense, a Virgo man sees apologies as a cop out. He knows it is easy to say “I’m sorry” but it is much harder to internalize the apology and do things differently in the future. You’ll know he is apologizing sincerely when he changes.
He Addresses Specific Behavior and Apologizes for Mistakes
A heartbroken Virgo male won’t show up with his head bowed, looking for your forgiveness. He will address his behaviors or words that led to the conflict. Yet as a perfectionist, he also holds himself to a high standard.
Rather than beating himself up for making a mistake, he will strive to avoid making future mistakes by changing the core specific behaviors. He is humble enough to admit his flaws when he understands them.
A Virgo man will address his role in the problem and will apologize for his mistakes. Yet he won’t show remorse for his thoughts, his ideas or his feelings. He will also not apologize for how he makes you feel about a situation.
He has clear boundaries and knows that your feelings are yours. He won’t apologize for the abstract, only for the concrete. Tangible things like actions and words he will make amends for.
He Apologizes in Tangible Ways
If you’re wondering how to hurt a Virgo man’s feelings, know that he doesn’t get emotionally invested in the abstract. He responds to tangible things and concrete, visible actions.
As such, a Virgo man will apologize in tangible ways. He’s good at keeping his emotions out of the situation. He may not fully understand your emotional need for reconciliation. Instead he’s looking at solving the core issue.
He’ll apologize in tangible ways. You may not hear him say “I’m sorry.” You will be able to see it. He’ll do things to make his transgressions up to you. He’ll show up with food or cook you dinner.
He’ll fix things, he’ll do favors for you. He’ll try to make your life more efficient and comfortable. He may give a gift in apology but usually will focus on doing practical things to put your mind at ease.
He will try to show you in tangible ways that he wants to make your life better and wants to make things up to you. This is important to understand. Otherwise you may overlook his understated nature and focus only on what wasn’t said.
He’ll Apologize Briefly and Unemotionally
If you’re wondering how to make a Virgo man obsessed with you, the key is to not expect too much from him emotionally. Appreciate all the practical and logical things he does for you. Don’t try to get him to show vulnerability.
A Virgo man will show you he cares by addressing the matter directly. Think of his style of apology as less sentimental than practical. He’ll say he’s sorry and then point to practical things that led to the issue.
This is not a matter of making excuses or justifications, although it seems like it. He’s a perfectionist and tries to uphold a high standard for himself. He also wants to analyze all the related issues.
As a result he may seem like he’s dodging the real issue. He’s not. In fact, he’s likely to address the actual issue but not address the emotional aspects of the situation. He’ll apologize the way a professional colleague may apologize. Direct but without passion.
He’ll Make a Peace Offering
Though he is usually not one to compromise, a Virgo man will make a peace offering as an attempt at reconciliation. He may offer to do things for you to make your day easier, like fixing your car, changing your oil or mowing your lawn.
He may offer a gift as part of his apology. Usually, when a Virgo man does this he is not trying to be showy and opulent. He won’t use expensive jewelry as a peace offering because he knows this can be misconstrued as “buying” your forgiveness.
Instead he’ll give a gift that is modest but thoughtful. He’ll do things for you and prove to you that he has learned from his mistake and wants to make amends with you. He may actually compromise on a decision he previously held out on.
In this situation, he may try to be more flexible. For example if you really wanted to go on a trip and he thought it was too expensive, he may concede and agree to take the trip as a gesture of good faith as part of his apology and reconciliation with you.